My friend and I often discuss the relationships between twitter folk – I find it an endless enthralling soap opera watching how these people will let us into every aspect of their lives, it actually feels like a real life Game of Thrones / Dynasty / Family Guy – all rolled into one. With some of the tribes and cabals I get the impression that this is purely an e-fantasy world… like Second Life, where people explore relationships that they would never or be unlikely have in the real world. However to me the much more interesting tribes (to observe) are those that actually live out their life using Twitter as a portal. This is a dangerous game because obviously we know everything about them, and they don’t know us at all, which leads to confusion when interacting because the social boundaries are blurred. However, where my friend and I differ is that there are certain groups I wont get involved with as much (having been burnt once by it all) and yet he optimistically see’s the best in everyone and therefore gets more stuck in.
In our discussions around the topic, we have agreed that much like in gay tribes you can see trawling Soho, Brighton, or wherever we tend to congregate, there is a hierarchy within the tribes, and the politics is rife. I find the Twitter Tribe will often feature:
- A Leader / Lord – Almost exclusively they will have the largest number of followers, and generally well liked by a broader group than just their “friends”. Oddly in my most fascinating group case, the leader in question doesn’t tweet very much, but when he does there is frenzy around it. And to get a tweet from them is truly a blessing from god – also he isn’t very social and rarely if ever goes out (that he tweets about anyway). I find the leaders of the tribe will generally always be very attractive, have good bodies (and oddly work in the media) in gay tribes, polite to everyone, and be fairly intelligent to get that mass appeal. The problem with Twitter is that once you become a “leader” on a social media website you fall under scrutiny unlike in the real world, where you can lead your gang of friends in any way – showing both dark and light – on Twitter that will not sit so well. So therefore to me they become a little sanitised and one dimensional, and they self-edit far too much for me to appreciate them and to fall into line.
- The Deputies or Dukes – These will have a large amount of followers, generally tweet a lot more, and interact a lot more. These characters seem to play a fairly crucial role, because they almost exclusively live their lives in twitter, even going abroad won’t stop them, being on a date, being at a funeral, these guys will tweet no matter what. End of the world… they are tweeting. To gain this appeal they are generally also attractive and fairly intelligent, but as they are not the leader they can show a bit more light and shade and be a bit more human (which has its appeals to me) but means they cant be the leader as some people wont like them, and we cant have that. In the group that interest me all of the Dukes tend to be close friends with their Leader and almost always there is some simmering sexual tension underling it – which they always strongly deny with mock outrage and clutching of pearls – but come now you are fooling no-one.
- The Deputies Consort or Ladies – These people are just the other halves of the Duke or their close friends – their main role is to look good, tweet inane rubbish, and never be controversial. These people often have a nasty whiff of being desperate to be accepted and for any scraps the leader will give them.
- The Ambassadors – Those associated to the leader but located in a different country or at least county – this makes it extremely difficult to meet the leader regularly or socially, but they often interact quite closely and likely to be extremely attractive. I tend to think in the group I observe these Ambassadors are the people the Leader fancies… they are often super fit, but not based in London, so they are no threat, but they help give kudos to the Leader.
- The Foot Soldiers – These form the mass of the hysteria around the leader… they will defend them to the death, #FF them every week without fail, probably will never meet the leader, but might get a chance to meet the Deputies (and if they are lucky talk to them) but they will tweet them extensively and likely get responses.
- And The Masses – this is everyone else that follows the gang – they wont interact but you will be expected to take note of what is said, and woe betide you if you dare to question the leader or their deputies because the full focus of the Tribe will destroy you.
However, wider than there are lots of personality types on twitter that fit into this tribe dynamic:
- the Lone wolves – independents that float in and out of the Tribe, they might be aligned to them at some point, but they generally move alone, quite independent and wont cast their allegiance, most likely to be fairly intelligent, and can offer a lot of validation to a Leader if he can snare them. (Don’t all go thinking you’re lone wolf now!)
- Mercenary – sell their love to anyone and everyone - whoever is the current flavour of the month.
- The show man - The jester – the illusionist – these are my favourite characters on twitter because they are clearly a façade for someone’s comical outlet, or extremely flirty side, but some people take them very seriously, or are outraged by their duplicitous nature. These guys are clearly there to entertain so I am not sure the issue.
- The whore – these are also surprisingly (?) my favourite individuals or members of tribes because there is a pure honesty to what they offer and why there are there, but they are likely to appear vacuous if they don’t provide something more.
- The Crazy – there is a whole lot of crazy on twitter but some of them are truly epic – they love a good long rant, they love to start random fights, but then they like to be all nice and soft – their schizophrenia is amazing to watch but tiresome if you get involved.
But more importantly to me than the roles, is the politics. The Dukes flirting, undermining each other, vying for opportunities to grow their fan base… sometimes I think it is sub-conscious, but sometimes I think their intent is clear – they want to be Leader or be in the Leader’s bed and officially be the Lady of the Tribe. The foot-soldiers fighting for acknowledgement, the Consorts parading their wears for all to approve of! It really is like Game of Thrones. I whole heartedly approve, but step foot in that arena – no thanks – I don’t want to lead, I don’t want to bow to spend my time massaging someone’s ego over twitter. I think these games, politics and the roles transmit into the real world in our social groups… I always aim to be a Duke (it’s the safest place) – but oddly on twitter we almost invite people to watch it. I can’t wait for the rise of the next generation of Twitterati and because I think a challenge to the Leadership could have me fetching the popcorn and sitting in for a couple of weeks.
Wednesday 6 July 2011
Sunday 3 July 2011
The Problem with Pride
I am sure this is a topic that is often covered and many people have already said what I am about to say, but I am going to say it my way.
On Saturday my timeline on Twitter was filled with a lot of negativity about Pride London, and mainly by people that werent there. I fully understand people not going. I didnt go. Not because I had an issue with it, but I had made other plans to go to a wedding before I realised, however I would have gone had I not realised.
Most of the people being critical of twitter were annoyed at the overly sexualised nature of Pride and the fact that people seemed to forget that it was about being proud of being gay and celebrating it, standing up for our rights, and raising money for charity.
I admit that Pride is quite sexual, there are the naked and near naked men (and it is mainly men although I dont think this is because our Lesbian friends are margialised as some claim) - but lets be fair we are quite sexual beings and part of our difference is about who we have sex with, so sex is going to be part of the day. And I also think that the day is meant to be part of the celebrations of all the many ways we have sex: dressed in leather, with bears, twinks, sparkles, which ever way we want. It is a hard mix to make work, because just as we all like to pretend we are open and liberal, there are some things we just wont get and seem weird. To me its rubber - I can understand it, I dont like the smell, it just seems overly complicated to deal with - how in god's name do you get into it - and I imagine it to be tight and uncomfortable. But I dont judge those that enjoy it - it's also their day to be proud as much as it is mine. So on this front I think we need to suck it up - we are sexual, it is what ties us - a non-practising gay (or lesbian) in my books is not a gay (or lesbian) - but at the end of the day we all enjoy different things.
Someone else I noticed said that they didnt need a special day to feel proud, they feel proud everyday. Well good for them, but I think they miss the point that it's not so easy or simple for everyone. I had a very supportive family and friends, I have rarely encountered homophobia, and I am obvious enough of a gayer that unless someone is blind and deaf they will realise I am gay and so I dont actually have an issue of having to surprise people with coming out! But even for me it's nice to have a day where I can walk down the street and hold hands with boyfriend and in the centre of town, right where a man was kicked to death for standing up to bullies. To be clear I am not a person that enjoys Public Displays of Affection and if someone tried to stop me from holding my boyfriends hand if I wanted to then they would have a fight, but I feel like I should have the opportunity, and if this day helps make it the normality then Pride is important just for that. Also though, I think there are others that don't live in Central London, they may not have the supportive family, friends, colleagues, and for one day it is nice for them to be totally surrounded by their community and feel normal, or even boring in the sea of gay faces. Again, this shouldn't be the case, but let's be real, it is, and so don't take it away from them and dont belittle it.
The other comment I saw on my timeline was about Pride being all about young hostile twinks covered in glitter giving such a strong Gay Face you're not sure if they are having a stroke. To be fair, the young pretties with a love for tan in a tube do seem to dominant but then it depends where you go and what you do. The parade is full of all sorts as is the parade route, and the bars just seem to be full of those that normally go there. I dont think you will find many young orange blonde skinny twinky types desperate to get into Comptons but yes you might have to put up with them on the street outside as it is pretty much packed so you stand where you can. Also I might add I always thought I hated these twinks but then my friend Stevo told me about it his outfit for pride... it consisted of a spray tan, an all white outfit, a Venice bejewelled eye-mask and angel wings - hmmm yes angel wings. Angel. Wings. I had to admit I thought "what the fuck?!?" But to be fair he looked the happiest I have ever seen him wearing it. I thought it was more appropriate for him to be supporting Kylie rather than stepping out in public, but to be honest, he is a copper, he has a stressful job where he deals with some real shit all day long, and if he wants to take this one day to wear Angel Wings then fuck it, who am I to worry.
So in conclusion, there is no problem with Pride - people need to either enjoy it or not go. Don't bitch about it and knock it for others - if it's not for you then JUST DON'T GO it ain't that hard.
(ranting post over)
On Saturday my timeline on Twitter was filled with a lot of negativity about Pride London, and mainly by people that werent there. I fully understand people not going. I didnt go. Not because I had an issue with it, but I had made other plans to go to a wedding before I realised, however I would have gone had I not realised.
Most of the people being critical of twitter were annoyed at the overly sexualised nature of Pride and the fact that people seemed to forget that it was about being proud of being gay and celebrating it, standing up for our rights, and raising money for charity.
I admit that Pride is quite sexual, there are the naked and near naked men (and it is mainly men although I dont think this is because our Lesbian friends are margialised as some claim) - but lets be fair we are quite sexual beings and part of our difference is about who we have sex with, so sex is going to be part of the day. And I also think that the day is meant to be part of the celebrations of all the many ways we have sex: dressed in leather, with bears, twinks, sparkles, which ever way we want. It is a hard mix to make work, because just as we all like to pretend we are open and liberal, there are some things we just wont get and seem weird. To me its rubber - I can understand it, I dont like the smell, it just seems overly complicated to deal with - how in god's name do you get into it - and I imagine it to be tight and uncomfortable. But I dont judge those that enjoy it - it's also their day to be proud as much as it is mine. So on this front I think we need to suck it up - we are sexual, it is what ties us - a non-practising gay (or lesbian) in my books is not a gay (or lesbian) - but at the end of the day we all enjoy different things.
Someone else I noticed said that they didnt need a special day to feel proud, they feel proud everyday. Well good for them, but I think they miss the point that it's not so easy or simple for everyone. I had a very supportive family and friends, I have rarely encountered homophobia, and I am obvious enough of a gayer that unless someone is blind and deaf they will realise I am gay and so I dont actually have an issue of having to surprise people with coming out! But even for me it's nice to have a day where I can walk down the street and hold hands with boyfriend and in the centre of town, right where a man was kicked to death for standing up to bullies. To be clear I am not a person that enjoys Public Displays of Affection and if someone tried to stop me from holding my boyfriends hand if I wanted to then they would have a fight, but I feel like I should have the opportunity, and if this day helps make it the normality then Pride is important just for that. Also though, I think there are others that don't live in Central London, they may not have the supportive family, friends, colleagues, and for one day it is nice for them to be totally surrounded by their community and feel normal, or even boring in the sea of gay faces. Again, this shouldn't be the case, but let's be real, it is, and so don't take it away from them and dont belittle it.
The other comment I saw on my timeline was about Pride being all about young hostile twinks covered in glitter giving such a strong Gay Face you're not sure if they are having a stroke. To be fair, the young pretties with a love for tan in a tube do seem to dominant but then it depends where you go and what you do. The parade is full of all sorts as is the parade route, and the bars just seem to be full of those that normally go there. I dont think you will find many young orange blonde skinny twinky types desperate to get into Comptons but yes you might have to put up with them on the street outside as it is pretty much packed so you stand where you can. Also I might add I always thought I hated these twinks but then my friend Stevo told me about it his outfit for pride... it consisted of a spray tan, an all white outfit, a Venice bejewelled eye-mask and angel wings - hmmm yes angel wings. Angel. Wings. I had to admit I thought "what the fuck?!?" But to be fair he looked the happiest I have ever seen him wearing it. I thought it was more appropriate for him to be supporting Kylie rather than stepping out in public, but to be honest, he is a copper, he has a stressful job where he deals with some real shit all day long, and if he wants to take this one day to wear Angel Wings then fuck it, who am I to worry.
So in conclusion, there is no problem with Pride - people need to either enjoy it or not go. Don't bitch about it and knock it for others - if it's not for you then JUST DON'T GO it ain't that hard.
(ranting post over)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)